Lily Gruber, Fat Motherhood: ‘I don’t have children by choice’

Missing motherhood that does not weigh, but is a very specific choice of life, that must be respected and understood. Lily Gruber It says in the podcast She loves me, she doesn’t love me From Corriere della Sera, speaking of her decision not to have children and the taboos associated with “not motherhood” that persist today. The belief is that feminine identity is mandatory through the son, The only way to realize the ability to give love is to understand one’s existence.

“You are not a mother, you cannot understand”: this is the phrase often heard by women who have not had children. “Outwardly one can then say: You are a mother, you cannot understand – explained Lily Gruber -. But do you understand what? The use of motherhood as an existential enlightenment serves the woman.”

To reduce a woman just for him To be a mother or not It is a mistake and a way to apply another sticker: mother or non-mother. By denying women a basic right: freedom without restrictions and without the risk of being viewed with suspicion. Because often those who rule don’t even stop to think beyond the decision They have no children.

“We always start from the assumption that the childless woman has given up something – Lilly Gruber explained – to be less fulfilled, less happy, less complete. And we obviously do not make the same reasoning for a man: it is a very outdated assumption and also a very pernicious one.” .

Lily Gruber She has been married for several years to a French journalist Jack CharmelotThe great love of his life. The presenter and her husband chose to follow a path that today is (unfortunately) still “unconventional”. “Obviously I, too, could have thought more about having children – I admit -. When you hit forty, your biological clock still forces you to make some reversals. But I didn’t have children for a particular choice. I should have been someone else than me. It wasn’t It’s about commitment or attempts, it’s about choices and priorities: you must first and foremost want your children.”

Fluently speaking four languages, Lily is a world-renowned journalist and host of successful shows. Missing motherhood wasn’t a “lost train,” but rather a conscious choice that doesn’t make it any less than anyone else.